Back to the internet

Well, I'm back "home" in Bangor now, just finishing up packing and getting the last of my things pulled out for the big move tomorrow. It's sad but I guess that was really inevitable, wasn't it?

My pastor friend Joe from Colorado is now a dad. We met in a hostel in Dublin this summer, and have kept up via e-mail ever since. Congratulations to you and Anita, Joe, and I wish you nothing but happiness. To see the pics of Robbie Burnham, click over to "Grace & Truth on the Edge" which you'll find on the right hand side of this page in the links section. I also recommend Joe's podcast, by the way.

This has been one long and crazy week. It's hard to imagine that in 24 hours or so I'll be en route to Portland with my furniture and the last of my belongings. I'll miss this place, and I won't. So much has happened; so much baggage. I'm thankful for the chance to start anew.

The new place is fantastic, although I was very happy to get back to a real bed and couch rather than the air mattress and lawn chair I'd been using. The phone and internet should be up and running this week, hopefully it won't be long and I'll have cable again, too! Then it will feel like real life and not so much like camping out. :)

September 11 & Moving Day Part I

It's late, and I can't sleep. I was going to pull out the ol' journal but I thought I should probably try and make this whole blog thing a habit. Every other time has been a complete failure - a couple of posts and then I forget about it. Somewhere out there are probably three or four failed attempts, saved on some server for all eternity.

A significant day, to be sure. Hard to believe it's been five years since that awful day. I was over with John & John & Gail tonight, and we were talking about it. I can remember it very clearly - the night of the 10th it rained like crazy and the last game of the Red Sox-Yankees series was postponed. I stayed at the Radisson in Cambridge that night, and checked in behind a flight attendant. I always wondered if she was on one of the doomed flights the next morning. That night I had the strangest and most disturbing dream I had ever had. I awoke to the sound of someone trying to get into my room and sat up in a panic as the light in the bathroom came on. It was at that moment I really awoke in total darkness. I was completely and utterly confused - the dream awakening seemed so real. It scared the hell out of me.

The next morning was a beautiful day, and I drove along the Charles daydreaming about flying away somewhere. I attended a breakfast honoring Mary Clancy, the outgoing Canadian Consul General. Immediately following, the awful news came. I watched the horror unfold at the Consulate. It was an interesting experience, seeing the reaction of a foreign government. I still remember the staff running around and the phones ringing off the hook. Around 11 or so, I finally was able to call home, and I drove Bryan home to the suburbs. The Pike was packed with cars like it was rush hour; the T was completely overloaded with people trying to get home. We watched the TV coverage as the fighter jets buzzed the city. The drive back to Bangot were some of the longest, quietest, loneliest five hours I can remember. It was then I was thankful to live in a small town in this corner of the world.

Five years. Hard to imagine. The world has changed...not just the outside world, but the one inside me as well.

Which brings us to moving day. I took my things over to my mom's apartment house on State Street today to put them in storage. The first load of things to be moved left with Tanya this afternoon. More will go with me today, and John will bring still more on Wednesday. My living room is down to bare furniture and some totes. The kitchen is still relatively full but the pile is smaller now. Tomorrow night I will sleep my first night in Portland. The next time I'm here I will be more a visitor than a resident.

I hope this is for the best. I think it is. I need this change of scenery, the new job, the new life. I deserve it. It's just so hard not to look back sometimes.

September

I had the crazy idea to start a blog in case anyone still cares what happens to me once I relocate south of the Volvo line.

I moved my office today and got it all set up. It was bittersweet, I have to say. Great move for me personally and professionally, but sad. I mean, hell, I've spent my life here in Bangor. But Portland is a great city and it was absolutely gorgeous down there today. Once I got done at the office I walked past the new place and then drove out to Two Lights. Always a good place to go and get centered. I thought of Dad - that was where he went to think when Grammy was sick. I think he was there with me today.

Still hard to believe that next week I'll be moving my stuff into my new apartment, though. First will be my belongings - next weekend my furniture will follow. I'll be sleeping on an air mattress for a few days in Portland until I can get my real bed there. The place in Bangor is about 3/4 packed, pictures off the walls, not quite to the echoing stage but getting there for sure. I got back today to the landlord showing the apartment. It's becoming frighteningly real.

(My apartment is off the left side of the photo. My office is in the last tall building at the extreme left, next to the Time & Temperature Building.)

Today's song of the day: Sheryl Crow's "Crash and Burn" from The Globe Sessions.